


Nice legs, Daisy dukes, makes a troll go, “Eridan, what the fuck?”

by witheringWriter



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Black Romance, M/M, Sexual Content, Xeno, cross-dressing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-09
Updated: 2013-01-09
Packaged: 2017-11-24 06:39:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,645
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/631537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/witheringWriter/pseuds/witheringWriter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You are SOLLUX CAPTOR and you are happy that <strike>your</strike> ED got jumped and forced to wear different clothes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nice legs, Daisy dukes, makes a troll go, “Eridan, what the fuck?”

**Author's Note:**

> (uploaded from tumblr)

\---

You were chilling by your computer and its lovely multi-monitor set. Each screen had some piece of information you tried to filter through to help out the gang to defeat the big bad.

(The door snapped open, then close.)

And getting distracted really wasn’t your idea of helping.

“Eridan,” you ground out, not turning away from the screens. He looked down with a pout and his arms crossed. “What the fuck?”

“An alternate-timeline me just jumped me and made us switch clothes. And I refuse to go out naked so this I had to take his clothes,” he muttered venomously. You eyed him above your glasses and shrugged with a slight cough, unsure of what exactly you were seeing. Some clacking sounds made its towards you.

“Is it possible for you to find him with your computer?” he asked. His voice was hesitant and it sounded like he really didn’t want to ask.

“Uh…Yeah. I should…” you say. He gives a sigh of relief before looking at you through the corner of his eye.

“I thought you were blinded,” he said. You scoff.

“Yeah. My dancestor and TZ helped out a bit. These glasses,” you say, gesturing to them, “They can recognize colors and translate them into something I can read. Kinda like how TZ can smell and taste colors. Except I can actually see.” You smirk widely at this point and see that Eridan was getting uncomfortable.

“I can also see that you are wearing a skirt and a crop top,” you continued to leer at him from your seat, lifting up his skirt a little. He pushed it down with a gasp. “And panties too? You’ve pulled all the stops haven’t you?” You smirk.

“It was an alternate-version-.”

“Still you,” you interrupt with a shit-eating grin. You continued eying him up and down before the world went colorless again.

“Are you goin’ to help me or not?” Eridan hissed, tapping his foot. You rubbed your eyes and groaned. “Are you?!”

“Yes, yes! Okay! Give me my glasses now,” you said with an irritated sigh. He places them on the bridge of your nose and you push it up with a huff.

You switch the stations to dreambubble-cameras that Dave mucked around with. No one was really around and you were pretty sure that some of those messed up colors were some people consummating. Eridan’s small choke on his saliva seemed to prove that.

“Can you see him? I don’t know what color he is,” you said. Eridan huffed and shook his head.

“You seemed to look at me enough. How can you not see him?” he said. You pointed at the screens and placed your hand on one of them.

“I can see physical objects in front of me and words on my screen. People or screens are messed up projections. Now, can you see yourself in one of those monitors?” you said in a condescending way. He recognized it and scoffed.

His eyes widened and he pointed at one screen.

“There, there, there! Where is it?!” he said, almost crawling half-way on the table and trying to recognize the place himself. With a few clicks of the keyboard, you try to find out.

Then the screens went dark. Everything did actually.

“What happened. Did you do something?” you asked.

“Well… Not the me that’s here. He did though,” Eridan sighed. “He used the wand in my pocket and cut off the power.”

“Ooh, he’s good,” you said with a laugh before scowling deeply. It was dark without the lights on and you could just make out the outline of Eridan…

He was sitting on the table, hands in his lap and his legs swinging back and forth. His fins were flapping slowly and he licked his lips before sighing.

You reached out and felt his knee and allowed your hand to slip further up. You heard him gasp and the flapping of his fins become more erratic.

“What are you doin’ Sol?” he asked you in a low tone. You shrugged.

“I can’t see properly. I’m feeling my way around. Why?” you say with a small smirk. You could tell that Eridan’s eyes were hooded and went on to sneak your hand up his skirt.

“You know exactly what you’re doing!” Eridan hissed. You could feel his knees be brought closer together with your hand still between his thighs. It was warm and there was a heat pulsating under there. You knew what it was and stood up in front of him.

“Why did you ask then?” you replied, stroking his inner thighs. He shuddered and he tried to stop himself from lurching forward.

“To give you a chance to back out,” he growled, gasping when Sollux just barely stroked his nook. “Ah- Fuck!”

“Do you know what I’m doing?” you purr licking his fin before resting your head on his.

“Being a dick?” Eridan questioned. You squeeze his lower parts and he bucks up, holding a cry in his hand.

“Try again,” you murmur, nipping his shoulder and then to the crook of his neck.

“You don’t want a quadrant with me so why are you doing this?” he croaked. You kissed his neck softly, biting at it.

“Because we’re needy too,” you answer, “And you’re being a jerk seducing me with your short skirt.” You put a hand on his outer thigh, moving it toward his ass and lifting his skirt up some more. He doesn’t stop you this time.

“You’ve got a nice ass and great legs ED,” you comment in appreciation. He scoffed and pulled your roaming hands away, crossing one leg over the other.

“Thanks for the compliment asshole,” he said with a scowl. He kicks you back into your seat and straddles you on it.

“What would you do if I wanted this too?” he says, his voice low and venomous.

“What would you do if Eridan wanted you to fuck him over the table?” he asked in a sultry voice. You shuddered slightly when he whispered in your ear.

“Don’t try to take advantage of me Sol. I’m not going to let you play with me,” he hissed. He starts to get up…

“Does Eridan want me to do that?” you stop him from leaving by grabbing his waist and shoving him closer to you.

“What?”

“Does ED want me to screw him into another dreambubble on this very table?” you reword your question, grabbing his ass and pressing your bulges together.

“N-No,” he murmured with a growl. You jerk him forward again and he rocks up as well, his bulge growing a bit more. You could make out his tentacle-member wriggling in his slowly wetting panties.

“Well your bulge isn’t agreeing with you,” you said, almost gleeful at his humiliating situation. You run a finger up the underside of his feeler and it shivers erratically.

“Please stop Sol,” he whimpered into your neck. You bit your lip trying to hold back a growl.

“You’re seducing me again ED,” you say. You pulled down the purple-soaked underwear and unzipped your pants. Yellow and purple members wrapped around each other and stroked each other til they were both soaked in each others pre-release.

You grip them both and stroke them both in your hand, rougher and harder. Eridan mewls over you and tries to still his member but ending up unconsciously pumping it. You grab yours and lead the tip to his nook, pausing. He pants and gives you a withering look.

“What are you doing? Go,” he said. You shook your head.

“Stand up,” you ordered. He complied. This is too easy, you thought.

“Now spread your legs and bend over the table,” you barked. He winced and did so. You smirk slightly.

“Now why don’t you finger fuck yourself for Sol,” you tell him with a leering grin. He turned to you with a horrified look.

“Fuck no!” he spluttered. “What the fuck Sol?! Just hurry up and fuck me then ditch me!” His tone was almost whiny but you did just turn him on then leave him to deal with it himself.

“Do it otherwise I won’t fuck you,” you bargained. He chuckled darkly.

“You really think your double dick is that special?” he cooed condescendingly. “There are other timelines that will want to fuck me Sol.”

“And yet you come here to me,” you reply, head tilted to the side and leaning on your fist. You’re smirking and boy you know it. You know that Eridan wants you to fuck him badly. And you don’t care if he did really walk out. Because he a growl and a sniff he was slowly spreading his legs and reaching down for his nook.

You watched him with his legs trembling and his fingers teasing the outer grey flesh before sliding it across the slit. His other hand was jerking him off, softly and in an excruciatingly slow way. He was being purposely loud too. He cried numerous amounts of “Oh cod!”s before actually meaning it.

He finally plunged two fingers deep into his nook before taking them out halfway. He hissed at the purposeful sudden intrusion and gasped when he put in a third. He whined and continued pushing in and out, purple self-lubricant covering his fingers.

You suddenly felt that urge to just leave him there to fuck himself while you jerk yourself off to that image. Just to taunt him. But you also really wanted to fuck him as well. You tried to find a line between being an evil dick and leaving him behind or fucking him raw because he looked just… delectable.

“Sol! Please! Fuck!” he whined. You blinked yourself out of you thoughtful haze and your feeler was just wanting to stretch itself towards Eridan’s nook.

He stopped giving you a lovely view from behind and gave you a better one from the front. He was still finger fucking and jerking himself into an unsatisfied lust, eyes watering and wanting you under a breaking glare. His mouth was salivating and it dribbled down the corners of his moaning mouth, dripping down his neck. Sweat made the Aquarius shine a little more in the darkness under your gaze. He certainly was delectable.

You stand, swinging your feeler to and fro and watching Eridan’s eyes shine in anticipation. One part of your two-pronged member stroked the underside of the Eridan’s feeler while the other part was stroking his nook. He didn’t stop fucking himself because he needed you in him. He really did and you just enjoyed make this as long and as torturous as troll-ly possible.

You graze his thighs, throwing his legs over your shoulders and kissing the inside of them. He locked them around your neck and tried to shove your feeler further into his nook but failed. You grinned at his futile attempt and peppered kisses and bitemarks on his inner thighs, nipping a bite a little more until it either bled or turned a deep purple just like his bodily fluids.

“Oh, for the love of fuck Sol!” he cried, irritated at being edged in such a way. “Just put it in and fuck me!”

“Say the magic word,” you tease him, bending my his gills and giving it a quick peck.

“Abra-fuckin-kadabra!” he said sarcastically. You growl at the sass and pushed in hard before taking yourself out and leaving him whine.

“Try again,” you tell him, biting deeply into his neck so that his royal blood spilled.

“Please Sol. Please fuck me into another dreambubble on this desk,” he begged. His glasses were fogged and he pushed it away with a growl. He looked at you with a look of disgust and need. It was a lovely mix.

You proceed with the fucking, pushing both of you - all of you - all the way to the hilt. Your thrusts were straightaway deep and hard. There was no slowing down since you were teasing yourself as well, ordering him to pleasure himself in front of you.

You could feel your release near and quickened the pace, not really caring if Eridan was as well which was most likely. You were amazed he didn’t spurt out his genetic material yet but you thought that he didn’t want to release quicker than you.

“Fuck!” you swore as the urge to spill was just there. With three deep thrusts you buried yourself all the way and held him close to you, making his body take it all. His own member spurted purple fluids between you both, all over your shirt and his tube-top. He moaned loudly before slumping back, panting. Your feeler retracted itself and hung for a while, slowly shrinking with every drop of alien-cum that released itself from its tentacle confines.

You stumbled back into your chair, panting and gasping for air while Eridan did the same only sliding down to the floor and leaving behind a trail of dull yellow and light purple. You looked down at your shirt and pants. You sighed and went to get another pair of clothes from your drawer. You chucked another spare at the royal.

“Turn the shirt inside out and they won’t see my sign,” you tell him. He continued to lay there breathless and you frowned.

“There might be something in that random chest over there to cover yourself up. You might find a cape or a scarf,” you sneered. You grabbed a towel and wiped the sticky liquid away. Sighing, you push your hair out of your face, knocking your horns carelessly. You strode to the far side of the room, feeling around for the Emergency Power Supply Switch. The lights that turned on were dim a dim red and blue. You chuckled at it.

“What is this?” Eridan finally spoke. You turned to a dressed-him, raising a brow. He rolled his eyes.

“What are we? Definitely not red, but you also refused to enter blackrom. And we hate each other too much to be moirails,” he ticked off, leaving the ashen quadrant out because that would be in need of a third that was not present during their heated session.

“Can’t sex be sex?” you sigh. He gave you a sharp look and you groaned.

“I told you I wouldn’t be used and thrown away,” he said, “I have no problem killing you a second time.”

“That I’ll trust,” you said, amused. You walked over to him. He was bent over a chest trying to find something more… ‘him’. He found a scarf and a baggy purple sweater. He sighed and took it. The sweater hung off his shoulders leave some bitemarks exposed. That shit-eating grin was on your face again.

“What are we Captor?” He had a serious tone now. He seemed to have also found a weapon and was holding a blade to your neck. You let it cut you just a bit before leaning over him and dropping and bite on the corner of his mouth.

“How about we learn about this blackrom of ours? I need something to serve as a… distraction… for the next sweep,” you say with a smirk. He mirrored it and grabbed the front of your shirt, forcing his tongue into yours mouth and biting your tongue. That taste of yellow blood was shared between you two. He licked the cut on your neck for an extra taste.

“I guess we’ll be killing each other a lot more then, right Sol?” he smiled but had a new fire in his eyes. You nod.

“No doubt about that,” you say. He nodded and turned on his heel. His ass was practically waving you goodbye.

You turned on the computer and went to find him again. You hoped to some higher being that none of your alternate-selves corner him. He was yours now. Legs, ass and blackened quadrant.

\---

**Author's Note:**

>  **WW:** How do troll-anatomy?  
>  **WW:** K. Bye.


End file.
